


Fanart for "Painful meetings" by Rogercat at ff.net

by Nuredhel



Category: TOLKIEN J. R. R. - Works, The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: AU Story, F/M, Fanart, Female Maedhros, Female Maeglin, Gen, Gift Art, genderbent
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-02
Updated: 2016-10-05
Packaged: 2018-04-18 15:50:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 56
Words: 1,897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4711613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nuredhel/pseuds/Nuredhel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>These are images i made for Rogercat at ff.net for the story Painful Meetings and its sequel Sins of the past. In this Au story Maedhros is a female and while being held captive in Angband she is forced to have sex With another slave and she conceives a son who is taken from her right after birth. She believes the child to de dead but during the war of wrath she Discovers that he is alive, he is the feared Warg rider, one of Morgoths war chiefs. He does also have a Connection to someone else of Finwë's blood, Maeglin is also female in this story and when she is being captured Morgoth forces her to become the warg rider's concubine. He is helping her Escape and has to bear the brunt of Morgoth's wrath, and when she dies it almost breaks him due to the involuntary bond created between them due to their forced coupling. Later mother and son is reunited and has to face some tough situations, both alive and in  the halls of waiting and afterwards when they are reborn into Aman society.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Rüsa and Maeglin

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Rogercat](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Rogercat).



This is the main character Rûsa and Maeglin who is female in this story, he is helping her Escape and has to bear the brunt of Morgoth's wrath. Morgoth wants to breed more slaves With the blood of the noldorin kings but Rûsa refuses to lay With her and they only does it once and it is forced upon them both but it is enough for them to bond. He is always wearing a metal mask to hide his scars and he is a most feared Warrior who hates his master and tries to help the other elven slaves as best he can.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rûsa ready to fight for his life.

This is Rûsa after he helps Maeglin Escape, the war of wrath is upon them and Angband has fallen, he is being chased by the noldorin Warriors and they have killed his warg. He doesnt want to go Down without a fight. But they do subdue him and he is hauled back to camp, fearing that they will kill him.


	3. The truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maedhros finally meet the son she has believed to be dead for over five hundred years, and she is to Discover that Morgoth in his evil ways have linked them, if one dies so does the other too.

Maedhros has the shock of her Lifetime, the child she thought to be dead is alive and there right in front of her.


	4. The death of Rûsa's father

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maedhros is forced to couple With an enslaved Avari Warrior, Taurion. He has already been forced to father fourteen children With different elven females and since having sex for an elf means bonding he feels how they usually die giving birth to his offspring. After having impregnated Maedhros it becomes too much for him and he kills himself using a spear, he simply cannot bear the thought of having to sire yet another child who will end up as Morgoth's slave.

Taurion is a chief of a avarin tribe so he is a proud ellon, he watched his wife and two children getting slain as he was being captured, the poor elf simply cannot take it anymore.


	5. Rûsa in the halls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rûsa and Maedhros are dead, killed by a Group of very angry Sindar elves lead by Daeron, the former minstrel of Doriath. Rûsa is deeply traumatized and has great problems, Namo is trying his best to heal him.

Rûsa is distrustful, filled With fear and anger and hatred and it takes a lot to get him back to normal.


	6. A mothers touch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maedhros is helping her son heal, they both share deep mental scars from their past lives and Maedhros is trying to Connect With her son the way she never had the chance to do earlier.

Rûsa trust Maedhros, he can remember her scent and she becomes his safety and is the one he truly trusts.


	7. The death of Maeglin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maeglin's Death. She is in Gondolin as it is attacked and while on the run falling rocks crush her legs. The others want to carry her With them but she can hear Rûsa calling her through their bond and in desperation she throws herself off the Cliff to save the others and avoid being captured once more. Rûsa feels her Death through the bond and it almost breaks him, which Morgoth of course enjoys a lot. He feels responsible for it somehow, i Guess he thinks that he somehow chased her to her Death.

Maeglin's Death upon the Cliffs, a little different from canon where the character is male and is thrown Down. In this tale she sacrifices herself to save the others.


	8. In trouble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daeron causes the Death of Maedhros and her son, but he dies too and is greeted by Namo who is less than pleased With the former minstrels actions. Maeglin on the other hand is absolutely furious when she learns of the fate of her former mate and Chases the sinda through the vast halls With a forge hammer.

  
He is in serious trouble and if an angry Maeglin isnt enough the son's of Dior joins the Chase since Maedhros tried to save them from freezing to Death and she really grieved when they died in spite of her efforts. I didnt have Place for them so just imagine two Young blond elflings chasing behind Maeglin With ropes and stuff.


	9. Celebrimbor's defiance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Celebrimbor is being told the truth about Maedhros and Rûsa by Sauron and the snug bastard is enjoying watching Celebrimbor's despair on his aunt's behalf. But Celebrimbor manages to piss Sauron off to such a degree that the maia loses his temper and kills the elf With a hammerblow to the head, a rather merciful end after hours of torture.

Sauron is really really enjoying himself but Celebrimbor is strong and brave and doesnt fear Death. And when he reaches the halls he can add some more information to Rûsas story.


	10. We need to talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maeglin and Rûsa were bonded but they don't love each other and the situation of Meeting again is rather awkward. They try to come to terms With what they feel and decide what to do now.

Things are tense, and they have a lot of sorting out to do. After all, they were forced to bond and to an elf that is rather traumatic.


	11. Do you see?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fëanor is allowed to enter his daughters mind while she is healing to help her overcome her traumas but he is faced With the terrible truth of how she was treated while being a prisoner, and how she looked, bruised, skinny and broken. And he is also shown the image of the night he swore the oath and she asks him if he understands what he has done to the Family and to her. He is shocked and terrified and filled With grief.

Maedhros is almost unrecognizeable, his beautiful tall daughter is just a shadow of what she used to be and how is he to help her overcome her past? How can he ever find forgiveness for what he inadvertently put his Family through?


	12. Back to bed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This image is for the sequel to Painful Meetings, Sins of the past. Rûsa is allowed to Return to life as a child, the valar thinks that this will help him adapt more easily. But for a former Angband slave life can never be easy and Maedhros has to present her son to the rest of the Family and worse even, to elves outside of it. And to them Rûsa is baseborn, a bastard, if they learn who he really was back then Things could get nasty.

Here tiny Rûsa has escaped his bed at night and Huan is returning him to his mother, Rûsa looks like a child but has the mind of an adult and he is not happy about being tossed around like a doll, nor does he appreciate being treated like a child. But sometimes it is a Nice thing, lots of affection from his mother.


	13. Comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maedhros is being comforted by her uncle near the end of Painful Meetings before she and her son both dies.

Finarfin offers a shoulder to cry on.


	14. The birth of Rûsa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maedhros survives giving birth but the child is taken from her almost immediately and her heart completely broken.

A mother's love that will be brutally ignored.


	15. Hostage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rûsa takes his mother hostage to Escape from the Noldo's camp, but the attempt ends With their Deaths.

They come across some very vengeful Sindar and since their lives have been magically linked both die.


	16. I am bored

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rûsa have been reborn as an elfling and has to learn how to read and Write, and poor Rumil has quite a job Ahead of him, Rûsa is both impatient and has problems With concentrating upon the Things he is being taught and sometimes his uncouth manners left from his life within Angband surfaces once more.

Talk about bad manners, i bet Rûsa really wants to learn but sometimes it just becomes too much.   
And as a little bonus, the Tengwar on the blackboard does among other Things say " Melkor is an ass"


	17. Involuntary haircut

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Maedhros is rescued from the mountainside the healers want to cut her hair to get rid of the tangles, lice and all, but she panic's completely, remembering her past experiences while being a slave.

Here i made a blunder, i forgot about the missing hand and had to remake the image a bit, but it did turn out not too bad in spite of it.


	18. Rûsa meets Miriel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rusa meets his great grandmother in the halls, and he is helped a lot by it since she lets him see the tapestries that depict his birth and he does realize that his mother does love him.

She is proud of him, and he is slowly becoming a more relaxed and less violent Fêa.


	19. The traitor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rûsa discovers a plot to poison the Family of Fêanor, and he tells Finwê who the culrprit is.

  
The reborn king is not too pleased by this, the traitor will face a nasty end.


	20. Within the halls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maedhros has a chat With Taurion, the father of Rûsa. They were forced to bond and now they have to agree upon how to raise their son even when the bond is released.

Here they can discuss Things in Peace, and come to terms With what happened to them both.


	21. The secret...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maedhros has a Secret admirer, and Rûsa is trying to expose him.

So apparently a certain Warrior of Gondolin, famous for his courage and the weapon of Choice has a soft spot for Maedhros. I sort of pictured him as a bit dark in skin tone, have no idea of why but i somehow thought it fitted him.


	22. Meeting Saira

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rûsa meets Saira, one of his relatives in Valinor and they sort of become friends and make some mischief.

She is a little shy but Charmed and he is trying to determine whether or not he should stay or run away,


	23. Rûsa and Narvi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rûsa meets Narvi, and Discover that she in fact is married to Celebrimbor, in Secret! An elf and a dwarf, my oh my!

She turned out to be a wee bit more athletic than i first imagined her, dwarrowdams ought to be a bit more plump but maybe she is working hard and staying fit...


	24. Rûsa and Rog

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rûsa has been caught red handed With some cookies from the Kitchen but Rog just laughs it off and Rûsa is embarrassed but relieved that his future foster father didnt get angry.

  
This scene isnt in the story but i sort of wanted to show the sort of relationship those two ought to have, and i thought the idea was so cute....


	25. Besieged

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From the sequel Tears of blood, here Rûsa is attending a ball and since he has come of age and is of the age where he can marry he suddenly Discovers that he is like a piece of raw meat to a School of piranhas, the Young noble ellith are all over him eager to Catch him and Maeglin has to come to the rescue. Here i tried a New technique, i found a suitable image on Google and used it as background. It worked out nicely.

  
With his past being ganged up upon like that is a bit too much, i bet he'd rather fight a herd of orcs...


	26. Finwë and Taurion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finwë and Taurion is having a rather awkward conversation, Rûsa's grandfather is finally told the truth of who Rûsa's father really is.

  
I used a poster of a garden as background and i sort of thought it fitted the situation, i Guess a garden in Valinor ought to be lush and a bit Wild too.   
And happy birthday to you Rogercat! More images are to come as soon as i can finish them!


	27. Meeting again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rusa meets Saira and Maeglin again, a happy Meeting which later leads to not so happy events...

Saira has grown and Rûsa almost reveals that he knows Maeglin very well from his first life.


	28. Rûsa and Cuwen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rûsa and his baby sister. Rather cute.

  
She is technically his half sister but still he has waited for her birth eagerly.


	29. Rûsa thinking...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The young Rusa in a very quiet moment, he is thinking about what the truth of his past will do to his future. I made him look a bit young and rahter vulnerable here, just to get the emotions out.

  
I think he was rahter afraid of ruining everything, after all, he used to be a slave of Morgoth, not all would Accept that.


	30. Rûsa and Finwe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rusa With his great grandfather, he is to swear an oath of Allegiance to the high king in order to prevent anybody causing problems due to his past.

  
I wanted to make Rûsa taller than Finwe, after all, he is considered as very tall and since he is half avarin i made his skin a bit darker too, since Finwe is a pure bred Noldo.


	31. By force

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rûsa is about to learn first hand how Dangerous it can be to be royalty. A Young elleth of Vanyarin blood wants to make sure that she get's him as her husband and as intercourse among elves Equals marriage she is trying to force him into having penetrative sex With her after having knocked him out, tired him up and dragged him into Storage room within the Palace. luckily he is on Herbs that sort of kills the libido she isnt going to get what she wants no matter what she does, but to him it is a freaking nightmare since her hair reminds him of Sauron and sexual assult was rather common in Angband. Here she is actually trying to choke him so she can get his pants out of the way. What a bitch!

The image was rahter huge, i had to resize the Whole thing and so the shape is a bit weird. Sorry about that.


	32. Out hunting...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here Taurion is teaching his son about the forest and the animals within it. Rûsa is still very Young here.

  
I wanted to add a deer just to show that the elves have a Close Connection With nature and doesnt hunt unless they have to.


	33. Maeglin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a portrait of Maeglin, she turned out a bit darker than i wanted to but it was because of a small mistake i made when i worked on the image and i had to cover it up and then her skin got a bit on the dark side but i Guess she is a very rough elleth who spends a lot of time outdoors, no dainty little flower.

  
She turned out alright after all. I tried to add some blue highlights to her hair to show how shiny it is. She seems very Nice in this Picture but i bet she can be a bit of a rouge too if she wants too.


	34. The shock of a lifetime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finwè receives a Message from Ingwe telling of what Vanè almost did to Rûsa. He is aghast to say the least. The letter is written With Photoshop in tengwar and it tells the story in short, describing the situation and everything.

I used an image from Google as a background and then i added him and the letter too. I think the result wasnt half bad.


	35. Ingwè is pissed off...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> King of the Vanyar dressed for Court and in a very bad mood indeed. He is to tell everybody that a crime has been committed which could ignite the sparks that may grow into a New kinslaying,

He is wearing robes he only uses when he has to act as a judge, dark and a bit sinister looking but also very stylish.


	36. Take her away...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vanè has been found guilty of attempted rape and is to live her entire life as a servant of the avarin tribes. Taurion is taking her away from the city, she is not very happy about her fate since she is a very spoiled and maybe also ignorant elleth who never have had to work a day in her life. Guess Things are about to change.

This image turned out to be a wee bit gritty, the reason is that i ran out of decent drawing paper and had to use some low quality paper that my skanner obviously hated since it made every tiny little imperfection visible in the scan. Trying to color it With Photoshop became a struggle, but i sort of managed to get something out of it still.


	37. Yüe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An image of Rûsa's half Brother Yüe as an adult. i sort of got the idea for the image and i Guess that an albino elf With green eyes would be absolutely gorgeous. He is not as tough as his half Brother, nor as buff, perhaps even a wee bit feminine in this image but i kind of liked what i managed to get out of it. Sorry about the uneven colors, my skanner is ill and adds a blue line at the side of every color image i scan, and i have to remove it With Photoshop.

So here he is, Rûsa's half Brother, born too early due to his mother being poisoned, he is albino and mute but uses mind Speech very well, and i Guess he perhaps will become very smart in the future?


	38. Return of the warg rider

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here Rusa is truly pissed off, his siblings has been kidnapped, he has been held captive too, and it becomes too much. He Return to his feral state, and that spells trouble.

  
He did come out a bit funny, but he is sort of leaned forwards almost on the run, With his arms out and ready to strike, I sort of wanted to Draw him shirtless :) The colors arent too bad, and i added some lightening for dramatic effect.


	39. Celebrimbor and Narvi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is an image from a new story that Rogercat is about to publish, it is about Celebrimbor and Narvi and here we have them both, mock fighting and flirting while preparing the work on the doors of Durin. I had originally planned on using the doors as a background but the attempt i made at drawing the patterns and stuff turned out to be an utter disaster so i went With the idea that this is at the beginning, when they are just smoothing out the rock. Celebrimbor has climbed up onto the scaffolding and asks Narvi for his Tools and she is like coy and "you cannot have them, look, you'll have to kiss me first"

I spent quite some time on this one, i added some face Paint on Narvi, i think the dwarves had a culture for tattoos and stuff the elves didnt and she wants to look her best, all the time.


	40. Brothers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the sons of Calcanis, or rather her slaves, captured by her insane hatred for the feanorians, unable to Escape her web of lies and anger.

I wanted them to look ragged, a bit on the skinny side, filthy and With bad clothing and very aware of the wrongness of their mother's plans


	41. Let me help you....

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One of Calcanis sons, Almo, tries to help Rusa after his mother whips him.

I think i got their Expressions rather well on this one, Rusa is as stoical as ever but Almo is nervous and scared his mother may find out he is aiding the enemy


	42. Dressing up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rusa getting ready for his coming of age ceremony

He is a bit thoughtful, not too fond of being dresses up like a Christmas tree, and he hopes this will be done quickly too


	43. playing ball

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rusa playing ball With his siblings and at 2 meters he is a bit taller than them to say the least and has the advantage....

Here Cuwen looks a bit too tall but she is standing in front of the others, i had to move her to the front for i sort of screwed up her dress at the bottom and had to hide it. so she isnt really that big..... my bad he he he


	44. avarin elves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to add some avarin elves to the Collection, perhaps elves from Rusa's fathers tribe?

I wanted to use Earth colors, to make them blend in With their environment and i sort of wanted them to look different than the elves of the noldor of vanyar races, more primitive in a way and more Natural


	45. Rusa's coming of age hunt.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rusa is going through his ceremonial coming of age hunt, all dressed up as the great hunter.

He is wearing a Crown made from Antlers With ribbons on it, and it is possible to grasp those ribbons and then sort of claim the one wearing it for a night, but since he is claimed by Maeglin already the others stay Clear. :)


	46. During the hunt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maeglin catches Rusa as he gets his Crown snagged upon a branch....

They are betrothed in Secret and are just waiting for the day when they can get married. Really romantic .)


	47. sketches of small situations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some quick sketches from Rusa's second childhood, he is a boisterous kid for sure.

These sketches are all made with Photoshop, and my new cintique tablet, i just love that thing :) 

Rusa and the cat, oh that is one loong story indeed, poor poor kitteh....

But Rusa doesnt give up, ever!

  
Rusa and Huan are friends, but not always, sometimes Huan just gets enough of being harassed by the kid and choses to pin him down for a little nap. 

  
Here Rusa and his teacher Rumil as Cat's, sort of....

  
Rusa is looking at the world for the first time from behind his mother's skirts after he is reborn.


	48. Rûsa and Maeglins wedding night...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Say no more, not safe for work! She is trying to help him "blow of some steam" before they really get at it :)

hmm, i do still suck at anatomy and stuff, sorry about that.


	49. More sketches

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More quick sketches for Rusa's childhood, inspired by my spin off one shot of gingers and sunburns.

  
Celegorm is trying to babysit, not a good idea.....

  
Celebrimbor has forgotten Rusa out in the sun, Maedhros is not happy! 

Celegorm gets hit by a basket of groceries as Maedhros rushes to save her son, poor Celegorm, i bet salad is good for your skin though. 

  
Rûsa is gifted a foal from Celebrimbor, to make up for it all. 

  
Rusa and his old pony, not too happy about its rider at all. 

  
Maedhros rushing to save her son from the burning sun, redheads do not mix with sharp sunlight, believe me, i know!!


	50. Grandmother

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just an image of Rusa's grandmother Nerdanel

Here is Nerdanel, the way i sort of imagine her. She is a bit like her grandson i think.   



	51. Character sheet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A character sheet of Rûsa, of his first body and his new one, he has changed, a lot!!

From malnourished scarred and abused Angband slave to eye candy, Maeglin is a lucky elleth for sure :)   



	52. The brothers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The three brothers who were their mother's slaves, and how they now fare

They do look a lot better than before, and are doing rather well, and one will end up getting married into the Feanorian family after all.   



	53. Female Rûsa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rogercat has made a sort of spin off where Rusa is a female and works as a healer in Angband, it is called A caged bird.

Here is my version of Rusa as a female, rather skinny, and very timid looking indeed. 


	54. Healer Rusa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here the female version of Rusa is working on Maeglin who has been tortured.

The female version of Rusa is the opposite of the male version, timid, shy, deathly afraid of suffering the same fate as so many other females in Angband. She is tiny and underdeveloped and tried to avoid drawing attention to herself all the time.  



	55. Maeglin and Rûsa.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here we have fem Maeglin and male Rûsa in Angband. She doesnt trust him yet and is very nervous around him, afraid he will try to do something nasty to her even if she knows he was forced to take her as his concubine.

The image is in black and white, i planned on adding color but used the wrong paper so this is all i could do.   



	56. Negus and Jarna

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Characters from my story A song of tomorrow, they are linked to Rogercat's universe so i am adding them here. Her character Narvi from one of her stories An open door is a descendant of these two dwarves.

They are from the Orocarni mountains, that is why they are dark skinned.   



End file.
